Positive, effective communication is the key to success in every part of your life. That includes at work, at play, and at home. Here's how to do it. Use these six strategies to communicate effectively.

•  You can accept anything without agreeing with it. Acknowledge amazing requests and outrageous statements with responses such as:

"That's an interesting idea."

"That's a novel request."

"What an intriguing question."

Use this as an opportunity to understand what the other person is saying. And then move on to other topics without attempting to argue.

• People judge others by their actions. This means you are being judged by the perceptions you create with your words and actions. For example, if you act angry, even though you feel otherwise, you will be judged as being hostile. If you sound helpless, even though you feel otherwise, you will be judged as being ineffective. Thus, choose actions and words that convey the impression you want to make.
• People judge themselves by their intentions. Thus, acknowledge that the other person's actions or words are correct and proper (as seen by that other person). Even when someone's behavior appears completely absurd, that person most likely believes it is justified.
• Everyone deserves courtesy and respect. Diplomacy gains more than hostility. It is always the best way to begin a dialogue. After all, no one has ever had to apologize for being courteous. When you treat others with respect, you set the standard for how you want to be treated.
• Everyone has valuable ideas. Everyone is an expert in some area. Everyone has unique talents. Effective leaders help other people excel at expressing their ideas. They ask questions. They show interest. They make the other person a star in their conversation.
• Realize that you can always learn more about the other person's needs, priorities, and situation. Ask questions. Seek solutions. Think positive. Quick reactions often lead to apologies. Start by being thoughtful and seeking to understand fully.

So, the next time you're communicating, implement these six strategies and you'll see the power of effective communication.

In a recent article by Robert MacPhee, he talked about comfort zones and how they relate to networking.   A comfort zone occurs when our “I am” beliefs match the results we are currently getting.  The premise is if a person sees himself as a good networker, if he is comfortable at networking, he is much more likely to get out and attend events, fully participate, and get the maximum benefit from the experience.

So, changing your thinking sounds easy enough, but exactly how do you do it?  How do you make a change that lasts?

This is where many people get stuck – the point where we declare we are a great networker but are shamed by the voice inside that says, “No, you’re not!”

However, to become a master at something which you currently do not consider yourself particularly good at, there are four things you must be willing to do:

1. Try something new.  In order to get to mastery, we must be willing to take the first step.  We must be willing to try something new and different.  Do you remember your first networking meeting?  Have you watched a child learn to walk?  Do you remember what it was like to learn to drive a car?  The first step is often awkward but a necessary part of the process.

1. Ask for help.  It is sometimes possible to get to mastery without help, but it is always faster and easier to get there with the help of others.  BNI is a perfect example of this.  It’s an environment where we can always find someone willing and able to mentor us to the next level.

1. Be uncomfortable.  So many people are unwilling to take the first step or ask for help because it will make them uncomfortable.  When we remember that being uncomfortable is simply part of the process, a necessary stage, we become more willing to get into action.  We get out of our own way.

1. Practice, practice, practice. Finally, the only way to get to true mastery is through repetition.  When we are willing to take action, respond to feedback, and then take more action, we get better at whatever we are doing—eventually reaching a state of mastery.

In the book Outliers, Malcolm Gladwell refers to research that indicates it takes 10,000 hours to become a master in your field.  That is a lot of hours!  But here is the good news: If you are willing to follow the four steps above, the first hours you commit will be a quantum leap to your results.  Most people are not willing to do it.  Most people would rather remain stuck in their comfort zone.  So even if you don’t have an extra 10,000 hours, dedicate whatever time you can and race ahead of the pack.

If you start by declaring a new “I am” belief—“I am an effective networker!”—and if you are willing to take these four steps consistently, you will soon become a master networker.  And you will have created a new comfort zone; your “I am a great networker” belief will now match your new results.  From that moment forward you will always be a great networker.  It will become part of who you are!